Voice-Actorless Audio-book

drama baby.gif

A friend of mine, or, to be honest, many friends of mine, find themselves too busy to read books. Too many find it difficult for numerous reasons, so, I took it upon myself for that reason, and morbid curiosity as to how fast I can abrade my sanity, to use the speech-function, some sound effects, ambiance and music to create ‘audio-books’.

None of it to sell, (it’d do terribly…), but, I finally was able to get feedback from my best friend, and his reactions make it worthwhile. Moreover, I found myself actually revising sections of my book as I’ve made audio versions of the Grand Order’s chapters. So far five complete, and partially the sixth.

In a way, I’ve forbidden myself from doing things for fun. Be it writing, music mixing, art, or these audio-books. Unless some action I do has some sort of work or social connection I tend to view it as a ‘waste of time’. I think, this sort of trivialization of fun, and I mean true fun, not something to do to make one more productive, increase social status, romance someone, etc–but true fun, for oneself, that has no anterior motive, is difficult for me to do.

Fulfilling my compulsion to always have a ‘reason’ for doing something, making these ‘audio-books’ does inspire me to perhaps create audio-dramas of my books at some point if the planets align.



Voice-Actorless Audio-book

So Much Writing…

“So little of me considered myself competent enough, (or haphazardly bumbling enough) to find myself in creative writing”


Between school, blogging and writing/editing my manuscript(s), I’ve found myself more drenched in English language than I thought could be possible. Speaking of which, 日本語の新しい単語と文化を勉強するのことが必要だと思う。I’ve been neglecting my Japanese studies, though this could be result of course compression thanks to Summer Semester. My intermediate composition parallel to my Buddhism class have been quite distracting, and unfortunately for Japanese study, it’s not quite as relaxing as drawing anime characters or playing Overwatch.

Best Reason to Play Overwatch * – *

So little of me considered myself competent enough, (or haphazardly bumbling enough) to find myself in creative writing. There is this ambivalence of ‘should I’ or ‘shouldn’t I’  to continue to keep going on with this. To persevere through the numerous failures. There is no financial benefit for writing for me. Perhaps the only thing that keeps me orbiting this art is the desire to write.

If left to my own devices, either I will write or I will draw. I may do other things like play video-games, listen to music, or other less ‘appropriate things’, but I will most certainty, eventually, create art for introspective purpose, joy, and entertainment in artistic creation.


I know, I’m going to still continue with my uncertainty no matter how many times I reassure myself of the validity of my reasons for writing and drawing.


So Much Writing…

5/11/18 「英語日記」Keep Pressing On


At a certain juncture, no matter a story’s medium, after continual consumption and introspection, there is a widening in one’s psyche. Imperceptible dimensions of fantastical expression lengthen with tremulous persona.

No matter if you read blogs, novels, dissertations, watch television, film, or play video-games. In a moment, perhaps seeded years prior, you’ll see your microcosm, no longer crooked, no longer immaterial, but palpable like the weight and heat of vibrant dreams.

5/11/18 「英語日記」Keep Pressing On


A mind split between a paved, clean, road of security and a more desired, yet turbulent path. I walked this winding, vanishing road before; but lost it.

I was left impaled; bones cracked, spirit decayed. Each time I traversed the cracking road I wished, I would be crushed, it would be a mirage, or an enemy. Still. I return to it. Either to emerge a fool or a champion.


05.1.18 近況

Five rejection letters and the novelty has dulled. (I’ve sent many more, but only have gotten few responses) Now comes the greater endeavor: enduring the rejections soon to come. To withstand the doubt that will laminate my perception. However, should I armor myself, perhaps I’ll survive long enough to stumble upon an agent that sees my work’s value.

Otherwise, I’ll disband from this quest, and my work either collects dust, or enters commercial dominion through my own unaided efforts. Where, it will be for the public to praise or ridicule, without myself having knowledge of it’s worth from the eyes of an agent or publisher.

Either reality may come to pass, however, I do hope my original goal sees fruition. After-all, recourse is never attractive after witnessing your failure.

Less chipper than I’d like, but the point of this is to let my thoughts come out.

I’ll have to work on devising something more charming to write. Or discover some sort of unique quality I might posses that I can share with others.

See Part 2 of my Rejections here.


05.1.18 近況

04.01.18 近況

The chaos that dwells within my mind must remain, lest I bore those I love.

It is a truth upon which I continually stumble. Frustrating, but understandable. But, frustrating. As I have scarce output for the things going on inside my mind. It builds alienation, loneliness.

People don’t care about my book, nor my characters. They aren’t interested in mythical constructs I’ve made nor the conflicts or deaths. And it’s just a fact I have to live with.

These characters and events within my mind will annoy only me, until I finally, possibly, find an audience who shares an interest; a connection. And then, they too can be annoyed by these fictional people.

04.01.18 近況